Shinkuu (shinkuu) wrote,
Shinkuu
shinkuu

Quiet

Oh! Also... I'm feeling a lot better now! Thanks for concerns from everyone. I think the answer is I've just become a sedentary blob.

Also, my body hates my folks' car, which is this SUV sort of thing you have to hop into (but not as bad as a Jeep). This past week, I've been riding around with them a bit, but of course nowhere near as much as when we were on our trip to TX. And every time I started riding with them again, I noticed those old aches and pains returning... And of course, when I avoided it, I started feeling better.

Pants are evil! Maybe my thighs are just getting too chunky, but they feel like sausages squirting out of a tube of toothpaste when I hop into their car. It's like... With normal, everyday movement, I feel okay. But I guess doing all that... heavy lifting kinda wore on them. I wondered if my step-father experienced problems like that, but then I remembered he wears sweatpants most of the time.

Also, there has to be something wrong with that seating. It totally killed my back, though it's better now. I couldn't believe how much pain I was in then, compared to how pain-free I feel now. Uck.


Things feel strangely quiet now! I think it's a number of things. I don't know, but maybe I've never really been too alone? After I moved out of my folks' place, I went right to rooming with friends. And after a few more moves, when I had my own apartment, at least I had my dog with me.

But now, Kato's gone and my folks have left town. They were right down the street, so even though I wasn't living with them (an arrangement that surely would have resulted in deaths), it still felt like they were right here.

And there's even little things like... the stupid hum of computer fans. Since the big one in the living room is powered off now, it's SO dead quiet. It just feels unnerving to me, I guess... I suppose I just like always having some kind of ambient noise. Hence running TVs and waterfalls...


Ugh, so not sure anymore. I can't really be in that "Will I move or won't I?" stage because I already met with my folks' realtor and may be working with him soon. Like, this week. Part of me wants to be all Republican and say, "Whoah, slow down, let's wait on this." But I also feel like this is something I need to start moving my feet on, even if my head isn't quite there yet.

I'm excited about the idea of moving, playing around with a new place, unpacking my things... At the same time, I'm worried about things like whether I can sell or not, how much money I'd lose, etc. If I were to leave this house tomorrow, I wouldn't be sad about it. But I also have fun in this place and have no major complaints, even if things aren't ideal and I DO have many complaints...

As for money... Even though the market here is looking a LITTLE better, if I were to sell now, I'd pretty much be losing a chunk of my original downpayment and the money I invested in this place. However, when I buy a new place, I would also be getting quite a deal pretty much anywhere I go... Also, in the areas of TX we looked at, the prices were very low. So aside from the lose/gain game, I would simply have a lower mortgage and have lower monthly payments. There would also be no state income tax in TX, so that should mean more money in my pocket each month too...

So it seems like it'd sting really badly right away, but it should be better in the long term... And I may be able to enjoy the new place more, especially if there's more space and a bigger lot.

Not to mention, augh, my sinuses. I really, really did breathe a lot more easily down there. Back in Maryland, with its deathly humid summers, I thought NM would be a great change of pace... But turns out it's a bit TOO dry for me. I feel like such a sensitive flower. And the high altitude here may play a role as well...


Well, I guess I'll see. I'll keep packing and cleaning in the meantime.
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